I could do corporate events and meet with people who were open to giving money as long as they didn't have to actually come into contact with anyone HIV-positive (, gay men).
I wanted to smack them, but I wanted their donations more.
As someone who is openly HIV-positive, I often get the privilege of hearing from other newly diagnosed gay men from across the country.
As anyone can imagine, learning you are positive can feel like taking a cannonball to the chest.
After all, you don’t disclose all of the dirty details of your life on a first date, so what makes your HIV status any different? Those dirty details are the layers of who you are as a person, and they’re revealed as a relationship develops.
Being positive isn’t a part of your character; it’s a matter of logistics.
There was no question in my mind that everyone was at risk.
When I slept with a man, we were using a condom, no exceptions.
These real impacts make disclosure of one’s status nearly impossible for many, particularly for newly diagnosed individuals who are already trying to absorb the shock of their possible death.
Learning how to disclose your positive status isn’t something most gay men discuss over cocktails on a Saturday night — although it should be.
I had to answer the question I’m asked over and over again. Many of my friends think you should let the person get to know you first before launching into your medical history. Being HIV-positive isn’t the same as having a beast of a mother or being a Log Cabin Republican.
[L]ack of disclosure has been described legally as fraud, criminal negligence, criminal nuisance, and many other charges in additional jurisdictions.
However, these charges assume that everyone can disclose their HIV status at the time of every sexual act.